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nancyhawthorne | Thoughts about Life | Friday, 27 June 2008

Last night I went to the New York City Ballet.  I had an in house activity (Board Game Night!) and arrived at the very end of the second piece, which was the Prodigal Son choreographed by George Balanchine.  As I entered the dark theatre, the son was returning home.  The dancer painstakingly dragged his body across the stage toward the front gate.  My first thought was, “Where is the Father!  He should see the son and RUN to him.”  As the son approached the gate, the father came out of the house.  The father was twice the size of a normal person with a long robe and grey hair passed his shoulders.  When he saw his son, disheveled on the ground, he opened his arms.  The son hid his head and slowly dragged his whole body, reaching arm and fingers stretched to finally grab the edge of the father’s robe.  He then climbed up the father, using only his upper body, while his legs dangled, curled in the fetal position.  The son’s arms reaching around the father’s neck and holding tight as the father’s arms wrapped around the son, carrying him inside the house.  There was no fatted calf.  There was no jealous older son.  The ballet ended.
I was memorized by the whole thing.  How many times has my return home looked much more like this ballet, than the real story in Luke 15 of the Prodigal Son — dragging my brokenness back to find the Father waiting for me to climb into his open arms.

Fancy Hair

nancyhawthorne | Adventures | Wednesday, 25 June 2008

Those of you who know me… know that I love my curly hair.  It’s part of my identity and part of my fanciness.  Well, yesterday the fanciness was taken to a whole new level!  I went to the New York City salon: Ouidad.  Ouidad only cuts curly hair and they have a patented technique for cutting the curls so they form together and never do the pyramid – flat on top and fro all the way down.  When I got there I had a consultation with my stylist where I told her I wanted to keep my length and she told me in more words or less that she would make my hair look fantastic.  Her assistant (yes, she has an assistant) washed my hair with the special Ouidad products and I sat at her hair station.  After she then trimmed my layers and ends she did the patented “carving and slicing” which thinned my hair and made my head feel 3 pounds lighter.  Then they rinsed my hair so that they could style it.  The styling was so intentional and perfectly done… I will never be able to master it myself.  After dividing my hair in sections, she smoothed each section and divided it meticulously with her fingers.  She pulled and swiveled each lathered clump of hair and laid it down without touching it again.  On the top of my head she placed duck bill clips to add height.  The assistant came back and dried my hair with the defuser.  When I tilted my head toward the mirror, literally my breath gone for a second.  I was amazed that my hair could look like that… individual beautiful barrel roll curls, without rollers!  It was worth the arm and a leg I had to pay for the cut!
Later, I was walking on Broadway on the upper west side.  I went into an Orgins to put a little moisturizer on my face and an employee came by to assist me.  I said that I didn’t need any help and he stopped me and said, “Your hair is so beautiful!”  If it was any other day, I would have thought that he was just trying to sell me something, but as I said, “Thank You,” I knew that it really was beautiful!Taken right after she finished my hair(I was still smiling).

Living the Dream

nancyhawthorne | Adventures | Wednesday, 18 June 2008

Every little girl has a dream… one of my dreams has been to live in NYC.

I unpacked my stuff and sat in the bay window of the School of American Ballet’s dorms on the 20th floor of the Juilard building -right next to the Lincoln Center. As the sun went down through the buildings I can do nothing but revel in the fact that the Lord knows exactly how to pursue my heart.

Thoughts after my first year in the “real world”

nancyhawthorne | Thoughts about Life | Friday, 06 June 2008

In college one learns though gen. ed classes and GPA, that it is not as important to learn a subject as it is to know the subject better than everyone else in your class. One can have no clue what they are doing as long as everyone else is just as lost. It’s more about jumping through the professors hoops, than it is about learning a subject.

In the real world, there are way to many students to be the best. Someone will always be better than me and someone will always be worse. Therefore my only competition is myself. Perfection has become my competitor… and nothing I create will ever be good enough.

If that’s not discouraging enough, there is a power that controls the real world and everyone’s way of life. Despite our talent or our depth of understanding we are not in control. People we do not know make decisions that control us. It is all very overwhelming.

Two ideas learned in the “real world”: perfection and control — both unattainable.

Jurgen Moltmann has this idea: “the power of the powerless.” It’s where I recognize my own vulnerability and own the fact that I lack in regards to perfection and I am defenseless in regards to control. Mysteriously, when I admit this… there is no power over me because I have chosen to have none.

The idea didn’t originate with Moltman… it originates with God… Jesus did not say a word at his trial. He hung helpless on a cross… he owned vulnerability and weakness.

So when I think about this big, real world and all the ways that I try be better than everyone else, exemplify perfection, and possess control, I think about God who continues to wait for me to learn that, “when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Cor. 12:9-10)

Thoughts inspired by: Richard Foster, The Challange of a Disciplined Life, (New York: HarperCollins Publishers, 1985), p. 204-05.

Ode to “the man inside the computer” — Thanks Craig!

nancyhawthorne | Thank you | Wednesday, 04 June 2008

I work as the executive assistant to one of the most creative and funny women in the world. However, it’s just the two of us in the office… so every now and then… I get a little restless. AND, every now and then… I have a few technical questions. That’s where the “webmaster” comes into the picture. Via the wonderful g-chat, I contact him about adding t-shirts or used costumes to the site, dealing with customers that want .mpg files instead of .wmp… today it was: how do I upload to an FTP site. Every now and again I’ll get a Colorado weather update or a hilarious video blog or his most recent endeavor. All in all, he is witty and a patient teacher.

My grand steps into the 21st century with my video blogging: http://www.viddler.com/explore/Nan-cy-Saw or http://www.youtube.com/user/NancySaw

as well as this amazing new word blog are all because of “the guy in the computer” (actually in the beautiful state of Colorado) who has not only inspired me, but also hosted nothingbutfancy.com

So, THANK YOU CRAIG for your help and never making me feel dumb for all my questions!

To find out more about the “man in the computer” visit: http://www.craigkendall.com/